This luggage porter has a sweet, tight mule

The things they're saying about Dr. George Rekers can't be true. It just doesn't make sense that he's a secret homosexualist. He co-founded the Family Research Council with Dr. James Dobson for goodness sake. He's also on NARTH's board of directors. And as a member of the Heartland's most prestigious poopy sex investigation organization, The American College of Pediatricians, he's spent a good chunk of his life thinking about homosexualist potty practices and the danger they pose to this nation.

I believe Dr. Rekers when he says he has health problems and needs a strapping young man to carry his luggage. And I see nothing wrong with him hiring the guy after reading his profile at rentboy.com. Where else would you look if you wanted to rent a boy to carry your luggage?

How could Pastor Rekers have known that his rentboy was a prostitute? There's nothing in the guy's rentboy.com profile that would suggest it. If anything, the profile is tailored to catch the attention of patriotic Americans who're planning trips to Europistan.

In one part, his profile says he has an "8 inch cock." Dr. Rekers probably saw that and thought, "I better have this guy bring his chicken along so we can cook it up and get all the beneficial steroids and antibiotics that European chickens lack." Sure, at eight inches, it's not a meaty cockerel, but that makes it easier to put in the plane's overhead compartment.

In another part of his profile, the rentboy notes that he has a sweet, tight ass. Hello! A mule is a handy thing to have when you're carrying luggage across Europistan. It also gives you something to do when you get homesick at night.

It all sounds very innocent to me.

These rentboys seem very helpful. I wonder if there's one who could help us with our armor on gladiator movie night.